I believe that much, if not all, illness is a physical manifestation of psychological unrest.  I can say this, having caught some sort of virus, that what I needed– and finally reluctantly gave myself– was a break.  A break from my responsibilities, my constant movement.  I needed to stop and to be still.  To allow my natural resources to find balance again and replenish itself.

At first I felt extreme guilt and agitation… and rationally, I realize that these emotions were not helping the healing process.  After much thought, and a seriously hot, long, bath, I found my center again, and have begun feeling emotionally better about taking today off from everything.

With the emotional tethers let loose, I am now able to focus on allowing my body to recover.

I can’t remember if I told you all about this before.  So if it’s old hat, my apologies.

The most tastiest Num Nums EVA:

Take one glass of ice cold whole milk.  Add 2-3 tablespoons of brown sugar.  Stir.

Oh my great goodness, it’s amaaaaazing!

What is awareness? How does one become more aware?

As I’ve stumbled along the path of “Learning All About Me,” I have run into a number of metaphysical beliefs that seem to allude to the elusive state of Awareness.  Of course, it doesn’t seem that there are many easy roads to Awareness, or as some religions call it, Enlightenment.   In older times (and probably still even now) various religion-oriented monks would go on physically stringent journeys to discover Inner Peace or Enlightenment.  It sounds nice and all, but frankly, I’m not about to quit my job and become some wandering hippie looking for the next path to Awareness.

Instead of starving and isolating myself for forty nights (which I’ve done and care not to repeat again), I have taken baby steps that have led me quite nicely along the path to Awareness/Enlightenment/Utopia/whatever you care to name it.

These are some very simple steps to point you in the direction of raising your level of awareness.  This is the path I took, and though there are many avenues that will get you to the same place (ie meditation, hypnosis, mind-altering drugs), this, for me, seems to be a path of little resistance yet bares significant results.

(more…)

Last week was pretty grueling!  I took a four day weekend for President’s Day, so that I could get completely prepared for my Organic Chem exam this week.  O Chem is going to be fairly challenging this semester,  so I’m VERY relieved to have only taken the O Chem lecture and lab and to be doing research. Thank GODDESS for having the wherewithal last December when I signed up for classes this semester to have not loaded up on schoolwork again– last semester was sufficiently crazy-making.  I’m pretty sure I learned my lesson.

A four day weekend should have been plenty of time to get ‘er all knocked out and compartmentalized in this here brain, but we had the kids, too… and they were sick all weekend.  Grrr.  This meant that while I *did* take the time to study, it was interrupted at times, and I still had other things to do… like laundry and help blow boogery noses and stuff.   Is it worth it?  Absolutely.  I love having booger noses in my life.  They say cute things and it’s neat to watch them learn and grow.

(more…)

Letting go… it’s a bittersweet.

It’s the fine line between “Is this relationship worth it to me?” or “It’s not worth it.”

If it’s worth the battle, you should battle for it, no?  If it’s not worth it, you cut your losses and move forward.  Is the behavior observed within the Final battle more valuable than all the previous behaviors from before, when you were getting along fine?

All of these decisions.  All of these losses…

I’m reminded of how joyous a reunion between old friends can be.  And reminded of how painful it is to initiate working things out in order to discover that the other party is completely unwilling to come to an agreement.  Something was said or done that was SO hurtful that one party can never forgive it.  Or forget it.  Decreases the value of said relationship.

How does one take a temperature gauge when you never communicate with the other person(s)?

Ultimately, what one must determine is how much energy they are willing to give it.  Do you think they will be willing to rehash things until there’s a blank slate? Do you want to give that much of yourself to do the same?

How would one even begin to approach the breeched confidence?

So, I just found the COOLEST site.

LOL, I’m always trying to recommend this stuff to you all, and you probably block it all out.

That’s okay.  That’s why this is MY blog and not YOURS.  *wink*

This site is called Gaia.  You know, like mother earth? www.gaia.com

I basically stumbled upon it.  It’s a social networking community, sort of like myspace, only it’s actually very special.  You can make new friends, and you can blog, and there’s a place for photos…  It’s main tenant is that it wants to create a community of like-minded people who are interested in making a difference, enlightenment, awareness, and the spirit.  There’s a page, also, called MyGaia, which is a lot like iGoogle, where you can customize a page, giving you listings of discussions, news articles, your horoscope, and there’s even little meditation “rooms” that you can open up and it plays beautiful sounds and images.  Hellz yes, the hippie in me is jumping up and down!!!!

Anyway, come play with me!

Watch me

It’s amazing how I have been able to pick up just the right book for just the right time in this life. I’m currently reading The Great Cosmic Mother, which is a history book on religion and women in religion. It talks about ancient beliefs, ancient worship, ritual, and idolatry. The underlying theme is that history forgets to include the dramatic role women played in religion, and that much of today’s patriarchal religion is to blame. It was an intentional omission– one that would ensure that those who have come to be In Charge remain In Charge. (conspiracy theory part a)

Along with the synchronicity in the things I’m reading and learning about, I’ve found that the simplest “coincidences” have left me astonished. For instance, in my recent reads, I have seen a general repeating theory that time as we understand it has a dramatic change on December 21st, 2012. Some call it the end of time, some call it a great awakening. As of yet, I’m no authority on the subject, but I am going to give you a tiny glimpse of what I’m learning, in layman’s terms. (conspiracy theory part a2/b)

(more…)

http://www.vaildaily.com/article/20080214/NEWS/972891293

I found this article on the above Vail Daily (news) website. I think it’s really important that you read it! I’m amazed that this is going on– and has been in the process of being addressed since NOVEMBER. (see the letter from the EPA) I feel like our media is a puppet show. Here, pay attention to Britney and Angelina and car accidents while this is going on behind the curtain! Grrr!!

For those of you not familiar with Leadville, this should give you some perspective. Leadville is clustered in between some of Colorado’s greatest ski resorts. It lies 20 miles south of Copper Mountain and 40 miles southwest of Vail, 15 miles west of Fairplay, and about 30 miles east of Aspen. I’ve put my notes/references in red.

February 14, 2008

LEADVILLE, Colorado — The pool of contaminated water trapped by the collapse in the Leadville Mine Drainage Tunnel is an immediate threat to the lives and well-being of Lake County citizens, according to the Lake County Commissioners.

“Citizens, it is not our goal to cause panic, but it is our goal to protect human health and the environment. Lake County residents and the citizens that live in the Arkansas Valley Watershed are faced with an imminent threat that cannot be ignored anymore,” read Lake County Commissioner Mike Hickman at a special meeting of the Lake County Board of County Commissioners on Wednesday.

(more…)

Womanhood is a dance.

It is a constant balance of lightness and darkness, weaving in and out of our veins.

We want independence and nourishment.

And to be validated, not crazy.

But we are.  We’re crackers.

I doubt I’d have it any other way, though… the alternative is manhood.

And I count my blessings.

There are three sides to every situation:  Your side, my side, and the truth.

If there’s one thing that my guy has taught me about perspective, this is it.  What does it mean, you ask?  It means that there is no right or wrong when it comes to two people disagreeing.  There are three sides, and every side is different, and in the owner’s mind, their side is what’s right.

I have always been one to empathize– with people who have experienced a situation differently, and even with people who disagree with me.  It’s an important ability.  I don’t know that I would be able to go into the psychiatric profession without this ability.  In saying that, I acknowledge that all of my ended relationships have ultimately had the same feature: disagreement.  Not seeing eye to eye on a deal breaking topic.  Not having the same priorities, and not wanting to discuss and/or come to an agreement.  All of the friendships of the past have always come up with this same festering quality.  Perhaps I am stubborn.

(more…)

Newer Posts »