Hello my pretties.
I wonder if you’re aware of your actions.
We sat in a restaurant this evening and watched a man make two phone calls on his cell phone while he ate. The woman he was with sat and watched, quietly eating. It was really obvious and very rude, but not as rude as when he stood up at his table cursing obscenities into the cell phone, much to the dismay of all three of the adults at our table– with a five year old. Was he ignorant? Probably. Living in a lens of drama and emotion so thick he can’t contain himself in public. Sad.
I see drivers drive recklessly in the name of road rage. I see people full on scream at the ones they love. I’ve seen men beat women. I’ve seen a parent call their child stupid.
*shakes head*
It’s sad. It’s unaware.
Here I am at twenty-seven. I almost said twenty-six, and caught myself. It’s 2007. I reflect and realize I’m an entirely different person than I was a decade ago. I’m entirely different from many people I see daily. The contrast is an echo in this silence. It’s not to say that I’m so different. I’m human, and I make human mistakes frequently. I behave in ways that are embarrassing. I say things that fall out of my mouth before I even realize what I’ve said. The biggest thing that separates me from the ones I speak of is that I’m aware. Maybe not before, but after. I learn from my experiences. Instead of picking a fight with someone who tells me my behavior is out of line, I consider it.
I sometimes worry that I’m coming across as preachy here. I wonder if those of you who don’t really know me can interpret my voice through my words. I wonder if you realize that my tone is more of a plea for understanding from all rather than a hippie chick on a soap box. I’m not angry, I’m sad for you. I only wish we could all understand and respect one another as other parts of ourselves. Reflections, so to speak. Instead we bang our heads together, gnashing our teeth at each other… all in the name of what? A better parking space? The last Elmo doll on the shelves? It’s so miniscule, so tiny, so… deadly.
Eventually at some point, I do believe we’re going to have to get along. I thought of the rapture several times this evening. What if something DID happen, something magnificent, something defining? Human history is cursed with tragedies that wipe out entire cultures, civilizations. Where we’re at now is no different from where we were at during the time of the comet, during the time of the plagues… Gaia clenses herself. But I digress.
The point is that I believe that eventually we will have to get along. We will have to be united or we as a race will fall. At some point our fight or flight mechanism will have to evolve as it no longer poses as a mean for our survival. I’m not holding my breath on this, though.
We are a strange creature. We are blinded by our own experience, fogged with a lens of whatever reality we’ve created. It never fails to amaze me just how many of you like to watch Jerry Springer because it makes your life seem normal. I’ll tell you now, you’re not normal. Or at least… you’re not functioning in the way you want to.
So I pose you this question: Before you begin to bicker, before you take off your big boy pants and show everyone just how big of a penis you have, will you consider this, that all of this is part of your experience? All of this is exactly what you’ve created of it! All you have is you. And us. And here we are now. Where do we go from here?
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