Sense This

What is it to be filled with wonder?

I am attempting to be more aware.  This is a constant struggle, some days it seems.

This morning, I listened to music on my drive to work.  MY music.

My hand-picked music.

My soul.

I sang at the top of my lungs.

And danced.  Driver danced.

And I realized today that who I am, and who I’ve been, is a dance.  The songs that represent my history, they are movements in the same crescendo of spirit.  Those movements represent who I’ve been, who I am, and who I am becoming.  And in light or darkness, in melody or dissonance, this song, this dance, is perfect.  In tune, out of tune, out of rhythm, it does not matter.  It is as perfect as the cycle of a blossoming flower, whether or not there is another consciousness to observe it.  This is faith.

Today, I walked without wearing my head phones.

And in the atrium of my administrative building, there is a foyer that shoots up for five stories, with glass windows that come to a peak in the middle.  While walking through the silent, empty corridor, I looked up and marveled.

I realized in that moment that what movements I make are meaningful.  What steps I take, regardless of whether I know my destination, are worth the effort.  These spurts of energy that force my muscles to contract and release are intentionally pushing me towards where I’m going.  My watchful eyes that sit on the front of my face are here for the adventure.  My legs and core are taking me for a ride.  Fasten your seat belts, because this is going to be a good one!  This is freedom.

One of the doctors brought back rum fudge from Carribean.

Today I actually savored it, and became drunk with anticipation.

I normally rush through my food.  This is part of a terrible habit I created for myself when I was younger.  I’ve recently learned something about habits, though.  I’ve learned that I can break them if I want.  My next intentional habitual change will address my relationship with food.  I have already observed my ability to quit addictions like caffeine and cigarettes.  Why wouldn’t the next step for me logically be about my relationship with nutrition?

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To be filled with wonder is to allow yourself the opportunity to see it for yourself.

And to know that what and how you see it will not always be the way that another person experiences.

A unique perspective.  And an appreciation… for what there was, is, and can be.